Day Off today

No radiotherapy today as they were carrying out maintenance on the machine so I had a nice leisurely day to myself. Went to gym this morning and walked for 40mins 10 of which was uphill so Im delighted with that as it getting my legs moving and my blood circulating ...
Had to drop my car to garage today. A fault came up on screen that air bag not working so he gonna take it in tomorrow and check it out he thinks its an electrical fault so fingers crossed cos I dont have the money to be forking out on services etc now..allergic!!!
Helped my neices this evening get ready for their debs tomorrow evening ..false tan and manicures and pedicures going on up in their house tis worse than a wedding ha ha..

Day 2 and what a long day it was......

Today was a hell of a long day... firstly got to hospital and no parking so sat and waited and finally got one. Then when I checked in for treatment they was a 40 min delay so hence I went on twitter for myself to pass the time(of course I did ha ha). Once I finished treatment I had to wait for specialist app which wasnt too late got out in about another hr..then had to hang around till 3pm for appointment with physio to check my arm as the thought I had a touch of lymphodema in it. So from 13.00 -15.00 i strolled around Wilton Shopping Centre trying not to spend money but of course I did...Im in so much overdraft now tis not funny but hey Ill be back to work soon please god can worry about that then... life is for living right now!!
Thankfully after physio gave me a good check over she told me my arm is fine so far no lymphodema so that was great news. Finally got into car at 16.00 and got home for 16.30 ...I was knackered tired.
But good news is I have the day off tomorrow as they are doing maintenance on the machine so not back till thursday so delighted with that...What will I do....

Day 1... Not glowing yet lol

First day of radiotherapy down and not bad at all. Very good system they have. I went in sat on table 3 young nurses then proceeded to push and pull me into place while I lay there weird!! Then they left came back moved me again then left then told me I finished ta? I cudn believe how fast it was and I was expecting noises or beams or some feeling but nothing. I can honestly say and MRI or x ray wud rake longer and b worse !
I've my own park space (well I've a pass to park in radiology space it's not exactly for helen mc Cauley) and they put a barcode thing on back of my book (book is a log of my treatments had one for chemo too) and in morning I just go straight to waiting room outside my machine and swipe the barcode they'll know I'm there then!!
Tired now do not sure if it's treatment or just lack of sleep last night(which it probably is)
So night all sweet dreams

Why is life such a bitch.....just asking!!

Not moaning about myself although life has been a bitch to me too past 2 yrs but put down a hard night last night. Not because i was sick or anything ..it was my neice 18th birthday party in her house and her dad my brother wasnt there to see it and celebrate with her as he passed away when she was only 1 1/2.
You'd have to have known him to understand why it was so hard there last night as he was a party animal always the craic and center of attention and idolised his little girl!!
Even though she never really knew him proper she still talks about him all the time which is great but to me and i know others there last night felt there was a huge gap in that room that you jsut couldnt get away from..Im sure he's watching over her all the time and shes grown into the most beautiful and kind hearted young lady which I know he'd have been so proud of x 
Sometimes you just gotta ask the question ...WHY????

Waiting rooms in hospitals

Well I'm sitting here in CUH radiology Dept waiting room for my trial radiotherapy run. How am I feeling? Well as it's only a trial run I feel weird half excited as to what I'm in for an nervous as to what I'm in for at the same time! It's great to know this will help keep cancer away but how do u tell that to ur brain which is shouting "eh hello u about to b blasted with radiation??" isn't it funny how we spend our lives avoiding such things so we don't get Ill but then when u get Ill ur blasted with the stuff to keep u alive??? I thought as I got older life would make more sense an b less hard to understand but boy was I wrong!!
I think it's time to switch off the brain an let machines just do their job!! As I say today is just the trial so I wont b glowing on the dancefloor over the wkend lol

The mojo is returning......

Just home had a great aqua aerobics class in gym and twas a great feeling being back amongst my gym buddies...and great to feel normal again. Ive signed up for 30 days for 30 euro so even during the radiotherapy which i start next wk i can go and walk on the threadmill or cross trainer and keep myself motivated..
Have my trial run on Friday now for the radio so hopefully all will go ok and I will start them Monday and from then itll be counting down days till im finished my treatment and getting my health and life back to normal again.
Diet well Im being very good plenty of fresh organic vegetables, even started eating peppers green yellow and red and butternut squash. Got a great recipe for red pesto so hoping to make that during the wk see how I get on.
Food today was:
Breakfast - 2 boiled eggs on wholemeal toast and decaf tea
Lunch      - Wrap filled with ham lettuce onion mix peppers and relish and herbal tea
Tea          -  Homemade veg soup including carrots,leeks,onion,butternut squash and potato with a little thyme and salt and black pepper to season...
Snack     - Fry's turkish delight ( i know but the low fat version of choc)
Also walked missy this morning a good 40 mins fast walk so not bad overall .... feel im getting my mojo back woohoooooo....

Well im home at last

What a great wk i had. I feel totally re energized and ready for anything! LARCC was a great place the food was brilliant the staff were fab the treatments were great and i meet some really genuine friends and know im not alone through my journey x Cant wait to get into my own bed tonight do as the bed was like a rock in mullingar so bring on the 6ft x 6ft memory foam mattress woohooo..
Missed my man do twas great seeing him today in train station and of course me baby missy who went hyper when i came in ahhhh.....
Off to bed now x

Day 4 going home tomorrow

Great day today started wit a trip to belvedere house in mullingar! We walked the grounds an gardens an they had a fairy garden wit all fairies an toad stools in it very magical loved it. Then after lunch we had reiki which I found strange I relaxed but my mind wandered a bit I think I'm wornout by allthe treatments which us great I must b after relaxing completely. This eve then we were suppose to go to see multifarnam the new house for LARCC but our manicures ran Overtime so it was too dark but I'm hoping we can go after breakfast in morning I'd love to see it!but I got my nails done an we relaxed with a bottle of wine! Cant wait to see Greg tomorrow an give me huge hug missed him loads!! An my little girl Missy ahh

Day 3

Well today ended up a very chilled out day as our timetable had to change due to the terrible rain we were having so we did art therapy in morning which I found great she gets u to listen to music an relax an visualize a scene then we go an paint or draw what we like !! Loved it I love art do! Then this afternoon cos we didn't have our trip out due to weather we just relaxed in sitting room an I slept an read my book an we did some tai chi practise .. This eve Cathy one of the girls did an angel reading for me. I was terrified but twas great cos I'm big into my angels an it all made alot of sense! Also one of the nurses gave me a "chillow" which is a pillow u put in ur pillow case which helps with the night sweats I'm getting they r all so kind here I really an loving it all!! This is exactly what I needed an someone is seriously looking out for me to say I got to cone at last minute ! Right off to test chillow now night night x

Day two

Well the day started early at 8 for shower then breaky! Didn't sleep too good bed real hard my back bit happy !! Had a short group session today then thi chi with Shay OMG I love it I'm addicted it's so relaxing an calming dif taking it up when I get home! Lunch was veg lasagna which I hate but as I said chef is fab an I ate the lot even a side portion if beetroot...I'm a new woman ha ha! Afternoon I had the nicest reflexology I ever had in my life. She said if u fall asleep don't worry I said I won't fall asleep .. Ten seconds later I was snoring my head off omg so relaxing! This eve one of the girls brought vino so we had a few drinks in plunge an a good old natter! I'm loving the few days we all getting on great an the place is brill!we got invited back free of charge by boss lady today to their new house next yr if we like too how nice was that!! Ok knackered now zzz

First day in LARCC House

First impressions completely not what I expected I was expecting an old house on a lake but its a new build (well 90's) an on the side of a busy road but lovely an relaxing!people I've met here are nice on first impression! We all have/had breast cancer an r all in different stages of recovery! It's good to hear their stories an see how they cope etc!! Had lovely Indian head massage this eve an a nice walk wit one of the girls from cork ! We sat on swing out the back an chatted!she can't have kids either now an is in the process of adopting so I'm learning loads from her! Food here unreal the chef is Malaysian an she cooks everything from scratch! She's given us all the recipes on Friday before we go! All healthy food right down to the biscuits she makes herself!! Thi chi in morning can't wait to try that an reflexology in afternoon!!

off to mullingar for a few days R&R

Hidi hi well im off to LARCC house in mullingar for a week of yoga thi chi mediation and talks with other cancer patients.. its basically all gonna help me get myself back to normal and learn to deal with living with cancer as Ive only had bad experience of cancer in my family as i lost my mam and gran to breast cancer and my sis in law 6 yrs ago so i need to surround myself with people who've gone through it and survived to tell the tale and have a more positive twist on this bitch called cancer.. I am still very positive about it all i dont believe im gonna die etc(not as yet anyway) but after all the treatment i feel im just starting to wear done a bit and it just becomes scary to be on your own again no nurses and docs looking after you although i still have radiotherapy to go but thats more precautionary so Im finding it hard to accept that i have to trust the docs have done their job correctly its gone and im fine !! To be honest and i do believe any cancer patient would agree the hardest part of cancer isnt all the treatment, losing hair,feeling sick, tired and sore after op!! ya they are shite times but honestly the hardest part is the mental stress, the waking up every morning trying not to worry and basically trying to cope with the whole living with and getting over having cancer!!
So im off to get in touch with the inner me and see how that helps!! i love a good ole pampering anyway so heres hoping i get some of that too....
So ill try and blog while there but will only have my iphone so wont be that easy but ill dif blog on my return to let ye know how it went and would i recommend it ....
So for now caoi bella x x